You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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