If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
