Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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