There is no way he is gay with that hair.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
