Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Dick very happy bro
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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