Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
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So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
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Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
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