Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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