Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Randomize
