Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize