That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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