So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
