What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
he just fucked me for my cheese..
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
