Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize