school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Randomize
