I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
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