is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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