Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
We are all done wearing pants today
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