And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize