also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Randomize