oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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