For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
