her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Randomize
