you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
