i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize
