haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
there is glitter all over my balls
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
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