I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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