Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Randomize