I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize
