Michael Bay diarrhea
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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