his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
