i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
