what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Randomize
