you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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