You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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