i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Randomize
