I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
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