We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize