Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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