you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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