And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Randomize
