She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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