Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Randomize