Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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