Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Randomize
