My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
