i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
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