he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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