I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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