She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
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