we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Randomize
